April 2026
Andrea Zians

My 14-year-old son was diagnosed with ADHD in Grade 5. At that time our doctor recommended medication. We chose not to go that route and tried other strategies, but since last year, he has really been struggling. The transition to high school has been rough for him. Recently, the school and our doctor have been encouraging us to reconsider medication. I am skeptical and worried about the effects of these medications.

Worried Mom

Dear Worried Mom,

It is common for families to revisit this question when high school begins. The academic and executive functioning demands increase significantly. Students are managing multiple teachers, longer assignments, and much greater independence. For many students with ADHD, this is when the strain becomes more visible.

I am not a medical professional, so I cannot advise you on whether your son should take medication. This is a deeply personal family decision. What I can offer is a framework that I often use with families when they are weighing this choice.

Start with your doctor. Do you have a physician you trust and can speak openly with? Does this doctor clearly explain the potential benefits, the possible side effects, and how the medication will be monitored over time? Are they known for sound clinical judgment and for supporting other teens with ADHD in your community? Medical expertise in this area matters. ADHD affects not only learning, but development more broadly.

From there, take an honest look at risk and benefit. Many families understandably focus on the perceived risks of ADHD medication. Social media has amplified strong opinions and dramatic stories about medications and the medical profession. It is important to separate stories from evidence and to weigh not only the risks of medication, but also the risks of continued struggle.

You have not described the specific impact on your son. Is ADHD affecting his academic performance? His classroom behavior? His relationships with teachers or peers? No student wants to struggle academically and socially while feeling that something is wrong with them. ADHD can create that experience. Carefully assess how significantly it is affecting his daily functioning and his sense of competence.

With that information in mind, consider what medication can and cannot do. Medication is only part of the answer. It does not teach skills on its own. When a student with ADHD takes the correct medication, they often find that learning and development become possible in a new way. They begin to build habits, develop strategies, and learn how to learn because their brain is more receptive. The medication does not do the work for them, but it can make the work achievable.

You also mentioned stigma. In my experience, real stigma often comes from feeling different and constantly struggling. It comes from watching peers succeed while you cannot show what you know. It comes from knowing you are smart but finding it painful to execute academically. That ongoing experience can shape how a student sees themselves.
It is also important to think broadly about coping. People often worry about the impact of pharmaceuticals but overlook the many other ways a student with ADHD may self-medicate to feel better. Some of these behaviors can harm self-esteem and academic performance. This may look like escaping into gaming, social media, or trying substances. Consider whether your son is turning to coping strategies that are not serving him well.

Finally, include your son in this discussion. At 14, he is old enough to reflect on how school feels and whether he is open to trying medication. His perspective matters in a decision of this magnitude. He is also the one who will live with the outcome.

Gather the information. Weigh the full picture. Speak openly with your doctor and with your son. Then make the most informed decision you can. I wish you clarity as you navigate this important choice.